...and the question remains

Why must I feel such a strong desire to be in intimate company with men?

Today my heart is aflame with passion and desire.
Movie reels captured the images of two nights ago and replay them one thousand times over in my head.
The initial contact followed by the exchange of glances-
Such electricity enslaving my body as we danced.
Our bodies fuel for the energy of the room.
Radiation of sexual angst.
Our lips a conduit of channeled, focused life.
We share the next moments that pass.
Hand in hand we float through the room that has fallen blurry around his brilliant radiance.
He leads me, and I follow.
My heart, no longer a beating, throbbing organ in my chest,
But a pool soaking into the rest of my body-
To the tips of my fingers-
To the back of my neck-
Down my spine and into the legs that carry me closer and closer to this mystery I am captivated by.
Each time our lips meet, I grow dizzy in bliss.
But I hurt now.
Sitting here not knowing if he thinks about me as much as I do him.
My head spins in a blizzard of my memories of that night.
I can't help but think that I am just another kiss.