I have been spending this past week in the most beautiful countryside in the French county of Vendee with my newly wed partner. We’ve been rambling over all the narrow roads winding all across the fields of grain and corn and wild flowers. On our journey throughout this county and the county of Brittany we have passed though tiny French villages that date back past our grandfathers’ grandfathers. Our vehicle is a little maroon Renault Five from the early ‘80s. I’m surprised it can reach the speed limit of 130 on the motorway (km/hr, that is). I’m glad Tony has been the driver, because most of our destinations have been smaller towns not very well sign-posted. Even though he grew up in this area we have spent our fair share of time going the wrong way and then having to backtrack and start again. We’ve covered a few hundred kilometres this week having arrived in Dinard in the north of Brittany after missing our scheduled flight to Nantes. The trip from Dinard to St. Fulgent (half and hour south of Nantes) where Tony’s parents’ house is took us about 2 1/2 – 3 hours in a little SEAT we rented from the airport (the airport was roughly the same size as a refrigerator box). We were five altogether in the car. Tony and I plus his friends Mimi, Fabien, and Julian all made the trip back to France from Cardiff after our Civil Partnership ceremony. We dropped everyone off at their respective homes and then finally arrived at Tony’s parents’ house where his parents Bernard and Danielle, brother Christophe, sister-in-law Sonia, and nephew Florian were all waiting for us to have dinner with them. From that moment on I have not stopped meeting friends and family from random crossings of each other’s paths to the enormous family gathering for the wedding of Tony’s cousin Julian (different to the Julian who came to our ceremony). The wedding took place up in Brittany in the small town of Ereac. All of the family stayed in a little cluster of flats and then drove to Ereac together. A French wedding is truly amazing. They first have to go to the registry office to sign the official legal documents and then the Registrar pronounces them legally wed. Then the whole family goes over to the church (which in this town was across the street) and the Groom and Bride enter separately after all the guests have sat down. The service was beautiful in the old stain glassed Catholic Church, but the priest talked forever about everything that was on his mind. When he finished everyone breathed a sigh of relief and made our way to our cars and drove in one big line through the countryside following the bride and groom in their chauffeured classic old Citroen. We all honked our horns incessantly as we finally arrived at a big barn in the middle of nowhere where we drank champagne and ate expensive nibbles all afternoon until it was time to drive on to another building for the wedding feast. There were six courses altogether I think I remember but there was so much singing and dancing and drinking and everything else I may have lost track. We all carried on drinking and laughing and then all the cousins went up to sing a song that Olivier (one of the cousins) had written. Since I am now Tony’s partner I am included as a cousin as well and had to learn the song to sing with everyone else. It was great fun in the end as everyone was singing together out of key and at slightly different tempos. Then they all sang and danced to some traditional songs of Brittany that everyone knew and joined in with. Soon some of the cousins found out that I was a singer, too and would stop at nothing to get me up to sing for Julian and his bride Marie-Eve. I sang ‘Ain’t no Sunshine’ with Olivier on the guitar which he improvised after listening to me sing it once on my own. That was by no means anywhere near the end of the night, there was still more champagne to drink and at least 15 cakes to devour. The singing and dancing continued until we all made our way back to our rooms and went to bed…well, I went to bed pretty soon with most people, but there were a few who stayed up until seven in the morning drinking beer and having a good time. The celebration continued the next day as well when we all ate some traditional food of Brittany and drank more wine and homemade cider and then I was made to sing again. I sang ‘Ain’t No Sunshine’ again and then Olivier flipped through his song book and there were two more songs that I knew: ‘With Or Without You’ by U2 and ‘Save Tonight’ by Eagle Eye Cherry. Tony’s family didn’t want me to stop singing, but Olivier and I didn’t know any more common songs. We all kept nibbling and drinking as family members began to drift off to their cars and journey home. We were one of the last to leave after taking our farewells with each of Tony’s aunts and uncles who were still about. We then drove on to Rennes where we met up with Tony’s friend from childhood, Caroline and her boyfriend, Tony. We stayed at their lovely house about 20 km outside of Rennes which Caroline drew the plans for. We stayed there overnight and then spent the next day in Rennes’s city centre where we bought my friend Juliet a couple gifts for being so helpful with our partnership ceremony. We had a drink and a wander and then went back to Caroline’s house to have a coffee before we drove back to St. Fulgent. We’ve been spending so much time with family and friends the atmosphere has been truly wonderful and I have enjoyed spending time with them all. I have to say that not being able to speak their language has left me feeling very lonely for some of the trip. In retrospect the whole time has been absolutely delightful driving through the beautiful countryside being welcomed by everyone we have stayed with or visited and even meeting very friendly people as we asked for directions when we got lost, but throughout every day I’ve had a slight pain in my stomach that comes from the alienation I’ve felt because I am only monolingual. I have no doubt experienced fully the wonderful and rich culture there is here in the French countryside, but I have missed out in not being able to share stories with Tony’s family and friends and be able to truly express how happy I am to be a part of Tony and their lives. I never thought it would be a difficult as it has been this week, but because of everyone’s warm spirits I’m left with fond memories of everyone and everything that has happened along the way. I can’t wait to come back and visit once I’ve learned a bit more French, and hopefully I’ll be able to have a complete conversation with someone without Tony having to fill in the blanks of my very broken stuttering.